June 7, 2024
In the end, the things we give always come back to us.
I woke up on my birthday. I had wanted to get up around 8 a.m. to make a cake, but I ended up waking around 9.
The ingredients were simple: fresh cream, vanilla sponge, sugar syrup, and jelly—that was all. Since I’m not a big fan of sweets, I wasn’t too concerned with making it taste better. More than that, I wanted it to look like a birthday cake filled with love. Something that visually captured the feeling of a cake made on a special day. In a way, it was a cake made entirely for myself, and that may have made it feel even more contradictory. It was both a cake to give to others and a cake for me.
Dried flowers, a tumbler, a drink, birthday candles.
My friends also prepared a cake for me, saying it wouldn’t be a real birthday without candles to blow out.
My friends also prepared a cake for me, saying it wouldn’t be a real birthday without candles to blow out.
I spent most of the day handing out cake to others, so I couldn’t fully focus on being present with my friends—but I still shared cake with them. Someone I met for the first time through a secondhand market gave me dried flowers as a gift. Another person gave me a tumbler, saying they had never used it. There was also a drink, and birthday candles from my friends.
Some people came to meet me in person, and others, despite the sudden visit, welcomed the cake with a smile. None of them looked young. Everyone seemed like a grown adult. There was definitely a sense of care in their actions. Perhaps it was care shaped by their own pasts, their own memories of birthdays.
It’s hard to call it love—maybe it was something closer to compassion. But to me, it was a day full of gratitude.
Still, unless a relationship runs deep—or even if it does—it’s never easy to express sincere feelings between people.
* This picture shows people who have conversed with me (through online chatting or offline meetings)
People who received cake : 7(secondhand market app), 1(campus app), 5(friends), 2(restaurant owners), 1(taxi driver).
People who sent messages : 16(secondhand market app), 2(campus app).
Items received from strangers : ‘A’live juice’, ‘Macau 20th Starbucks tumbler’, ‘Dried flower’.
